


Ten Years Later

by Swan_Song



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Jess Lives, Lawyer Sam, M/M, Murderer Dean, One Sided Sabriel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-01
Updated: 2016-04-01
Packaged: 2018-05-30 12:57:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6424978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Swan_Song/pseuds/Swan_Song
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam Winchester of Lawrence, Kansas, was proud to say he was perfectly normal, thank you very much. </p>
<p>In which Sam comes back on time, Jess lives and Sam's life was normal, more or less. Until that day, ten years later, when his world collapsed. <br/>Again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ten Years Later

"Ellie, I don't know what to do! Ever since that case, he is so depressed, and I don't know how to help him." Jess told her best friend. They were sitting in the caffe, and Jessica was more tired-looking than ever.

"Jess honey, he lost his brother. You have to give him some time. All you can do is stay with him." Ellie squeezed her hand sympathetically.

"I just don't get it! The last time he saw him was ten years ago! It's not like they were that close!" Jess sounded desperate.

"Maybe you should ask him? You said he never talks about his family, right? Maybe you should try to ask him?" Ellie asked, patting her back as they hugged. Jess was crying, and her friend led her to the car.

"He won't even answer me! He just... sits there! He just stares at the wall, holding that stupid amulet! I-I'm just so scared he is going to drown and I don't know what to do for him and I-" She started crying. She didn't sleep in a while, trying to comfort her husband.

"Shhh, Jess dear, it's okay. He'll be fine. You both will. He just needs some time." Ellie hugged her, until she calmed down. She drove her home quietly.

"Thanks. I-I really needed this." Jess smiled wearily and walked inside.

"Sam? Are you there?" She asked when she saw he wasn't in the living room. The tired voice came to her from the bathroom.

"I'm here." He said quietly, his voice shaking a little. It was the first time he talked in weeks. Jess ran to the bathroom, to find her tired looking husband leaning on the sink, staring at the mirror. In the sink itself were blood drops.

"Sam? Are you okay? What happened?" She asked, worried. She looked at his hurt hand. He wearily smiled at her.

"Yeah, I... I tried to make dinner. You know, to make up for... For how I acted over the last few weeks. But I accidentally cut myself." He said, or at least, tried to. She hugged him, hanging into him like she is afraid to lose him.

"You scared me, you idiot. I was scared you'll... Leave me, before I could tell you... Before I could tell you I'm pregnant. We are finally going to be parents." She whispered into his neck. She pulled back, and looked at his wide eyes. For years they were trying, and now, the only people he wanted to share this with were dead. He always dreamed how he would call his brother, and tell him he's going to be a father. He imagined Dean saying how proud he is, laughing and joking. He imagined Bobby, hugging him and saying how he knows Sam will be a better father than his own. He even imagined apologizing to his dad, showing him that he grew up good, despite not hunting. Showing him he is happy.

"We are going to be parents." He whispered, shocked.

"We are going to be parents!" He hugged her, excited, spinning her around. He kissed her, tears streaming down his face. She caressed his cheek, cleaning the tears.

"He would've been proud of you. I'm sure." She smiled. He smiled back a little.

"I know... I know it's personal, and you don't talk about them a lot..." Jess started, embarrassed.

"You want to know about my family. I- I guess it's fair." Sam sighed, and they both set on the couch. She curled next to him, wrapping his long arm around her and looked at him. She looked so tiny next to him, and it made him smile.

"What do you want to know?" He asked, looking at her with nothing but love. Her answer was sweet and soft in his ears.

"Everything." She whispered, her face buried in the crook of his neck. He sighed, thinking how to tell her the crazy mess of a story that happened to be his life.

"Well, when I was six months old, my mother was murdered. Someone just snuck into the house, killed her and burned the body. Dean... He is the one who got me out of there. He was only four, but he took baby-me and ran down. After that... My father was a soldier, before he married my mom. He had PTSD. After mom died, he started chasing the guy who did this. On the way he... He just started killing murderers. He started hunting them like crazy. My brother and I, we grew up on the trigger of a gun. Learning how to shoot instead of playing baseball and stuff. Dean more or less raised me, protecting me from 'the family business' until I was around 10. He wasn't so lucky. When I was nineteen, I ran away. Went to college. Had that big fight with my dad. Dean went to the army, and dad was proud of him. You know the next time I saw him, you were there. Dad went missing. We didn't find him that day, and Dean went off on his own. That was the last time I saw him before..." Sam's gaze was distant. He hugged his wife closer, and she wrapped her arms around his chest.

"Sam, I-I don't know what to say. I didn't know that-" Jess stuttered, trying to find the right words.

"Don't. I can't stand your pity. I don't- I don't want pity. I can't take pity." He said, pushing her away and curling in the corner.

"Sam, what are you doing?!" She asked, trying to get closer to him.

"Don't-don't touch me! Don't-don't touch me..." He looked small and vulnerable, despite being a huge muscular 32 years old.

"I-I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He muttered, and ran away to the bathroom. He heard Jess running after him, screaming through the closed door as he leaned over the sink, pressing his forehead to the mirror. He was already lost in his memories.

_"Got a new client?" Jess asked when Sam got out of their room, a suitcase in his hand. He sighed and kissed her._

_"I hate it when they assign me to the lost once. You know, those who are 100% guilty." He set to the table. It was Monday, which means it was Jess cooking breakfast. Which also meant 'buying breakfast outside because Sam was the one who actually knew how to cook but Jess won't let him do all the work' day._

_"Who is it?" She asked, putting a plate with burnt bacon and half cooked eggs on it._

_"A murderer. There are tapes of him stabbing that guy. Nothing I can do  
for him unless we claim for insanity." He said, starting to eat._

_"I just don't get it. Why would people go murdering other people, if they know the punishment is death?" Jess asked, eating too._

_"Some think that they won't get caught. Others just don't care. I heard there are people who do it because the punishment is death." Sam answered sadly, and stood up._

_"Gotta go. This guy doesn't have much time to wait for me." He said tiredly and kissed his wife. She probably won't be home when he comes back. He hugged her tightly and even as he let go, he held her small hand in his huge one, and looked at her with all the love in the world._

_"Don't let work get under your skin. You can't save everyone." Jess said, smiling softly, and Sam walked out. He got to the police station._

_"Hey there, Sammy-boy! How are you doing?" Richard asked him, putting a fistful of Skittles in his mouth and winking. Sam just rolled his eyes. The sarcasm was dripping from Richard Sanders as fast as sweets got into him. Sam looked through the one-sided mirror, and his eyes widened in fear. In the room, smirking like only he can while handcuffed to a table with a bleeding nose, was his big brother Dean._

_"That's your guy. pretty terrifying. He made one of my guys punch him, and two others run away before they hit him too. Be careful." Sheriff Smith said and clapped on his shoulder. Sam nodded, keeping his face calm, and walked through the door._

_"Whatever you sell, I'm not interested." Dean said, and Sam couldn't respond. He didn't see this man for ten long years. He was more tired, less innocent and hopeful than last time, but definitely him._

_"Dean." He said quietly, and the older man turned around. The look on his face changed from bored to happy to shocked in less than a second. He froze mid-motion, looking at his younger brother, who looked at him with such disappointment. It hurt more than anything, as Sam set near the table, looking at him._

_"Silence treatment, Sammy? Very adult." Dean rolled his eyes, trying to joke to hide how scared he is that his brother hates him. Sam kept looking, and knocked on the table. It wasn't just nervous knocking of discomfort. Sam was trying to communicate with Morse code._

_**'Why'** Sam asked. They both learned Morse when they were younger, and Sam was hoping Dean still remembered._

_**'Hunt. Monsters'** The answer didn't take very long. They both kept their faces clear of any emotion, just staring at each other. For an outsider it would seem like a silent brains match, a match that will keep going until one looks to the side._

_**'Which'** Sam asked, trying to understand. Trying to figure whether there are more of them around. Whether the little family he built is safe._

_**'Angels'** Dean answered, and it took all of Sam's self control not to laugh. Since when does Dean believe in angels? Dean wasn't a believer. What happened in the past ten years?_

_**'Not Real.'** San knocked, hoping Dean won't laugh._

_**'Real. Killers. Danger.'**  Dean was dead serious. His eyes were full of silent hate, mixed with grief. Just for a second, he could see something from his brother's inner world _

_**'Speak. Truth.'**  Sam knocked, signing him to start the game. They both knew the practice. Saying the truth, claiming to be mad, running away._

_"Fine, you got me. What do you want?" Dean lifted his hands in surrender, and Sam was ready to begin the show._

_"Hello sir, I am your lawyer Sam Winchester, and my job right now is to help you. Can you please tell me your version of the story?" He said after clearing his throat. Dean kept the show going, by telling the truth._

_"They were monsters. Angels, to be exact. They killed someone I love, and threatened my family. So I killed those sons of bitches. I killed them for hurting the people I love." He said, cold anger in his eyes. Sam played the slightly-amused-but-still-serious role perfectly, slightly raising his eyebrow._

_"Angels?" He asked. "Do you... Kill angels a lot?" He said, doubt in his voice._

_"Yeah. Angels, demons, werewolves and vampires too, sometimes. Ghosts mostly." Dean said like it's the most normal thing ever. And for him, it was._

_"And... Who exactly did those angels kill?" Sam asked, tilting his head. He lifted an eye to the camera, like signing them he is insane. The pain in Dean's voice was real. Too real._

_"His name is... Was... Castiel. We loved each other. He was an angel too. Their brother. They slaughtered one of their own. I couldn't forgive them." He said, his hands shivering slightly. There was no use to lying. They had the tapes. Copied them over and over again. Dean lowered his gaze, feeling the despair in Sam's eyes. It was a lost battle. Nothing could save him now._

_"Thank you. I will do everything I can to get you out." Sam said, clearing his throat once again. His eyes said 'Sorry, brother. I'm so, so sorry.' As he walked out, the door closing behind him._

"Sam!" The scream went through the memory, and Sam found himself leaning on the sink, his nails digging so hard into his hand it bled, just like his bitten lip.

"I'm sorry, Jess. I'm so, so sorry." He said, and she stopped knocking on the door, relieved. He was alive. He didn't kill himself.

"Sam, get out of there and talk to me. Just talk to me. I'm begging you, get out. Come to me." Jess was desperate. For about an hour she was knocking on the door, frightened. Sam opened the lock, stumbling out. He looked, but he couldn't really see.

"Come on. Let's go to bed. You need some sleep." She supported him, holding him tight. It looked almost funny, seeing that huge, muscular man falling on her. But it wasn't. He nodded, and they walked to bed. And as he lay there, another memory filled him.

_He was standing near the fire where he cremated his brother's body. It was nothing more than coal and ashes, just like himself. He felt too much to feel anything at all._

_"Hey, Sam." Sam heard Richard's voice, more quiet and soft than he ever heard it._

_"What do you want? To laugh at me? Go ahead. I don't care anymore." Sam said, his voice slightly trembling._

_"I don't want to hurt you. Never wanted. I... I came to show respect to the person my brother loved." Richard said, and there was sadness in his voice. Sam turned around, holding his brother's gun._

_"What are you? What did you do to Richard? You are one of them, right?" The hate in his voice was burning, and the angel lowered his eyes._

_"You can't hurt me with this, even though I deserve it. My name is Gabriel. You never knew Richard, he died five years. I was possessing him for around two hundred years. I... I was accepted the mission of watching over you. Just like Cassie accepted watching over Dean. You are not the only one who lost a brother." He said, trying to play indifferent, but in the last sentence his voice broke. Sam was shocked. He didn't know what to do or say. All Gabriel wanted to do was reach out to him, tell him that like his brother, he also fell in love with a human. With him. But he knew Sam doesn't feel the same. He knew Sam probably hates him more than anything else._

_"Well, anyway... I'm sorry. I'll disappear for now. And if you ever feel like... Like you need me... Pray to me. I can hear it." He said, and vanished to the sound of wings._

Sam lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling.   
"Hey Gabriel, you got your ears on?" He whispered silently.

Somewhere in heaven, high above, a golden eyed angel looked down to earth, and smiled a gentle and loving smile.

"Yeah, Sam." He whispered.

"I do."

 


End file.
